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Amber Izzo
@amber.izzo

14,714 followers

Stepped totally out of my comfort zone yesterday and went to a wedding solo. Stepped right into it when I was handed a glass of Prosecco 🥂 Two weeks ago I went on a hen do where I knew nobody, which helped in attending yesterday. But in social situations where I know nobody, I crumble. My anxiety is huge when it comes to socialising with people I don’t know. Whether that’s going to an event like this, going to an appointment somewhere I’ve never been before. Making phone calls, you name it, if it involves speaking to someone I don’t know or the possibility of someone not liking me, getting something wrong or being judged, I’m probably going to avoid it rather than dealing with the anxiety. Marco couldn’t take the day off work, so my options were to either not go, or go solo. I felt brave and chose the latter. I’m so bloody glad I did. The thing is, since having Joey, I’m very aware of my behaviours. I’m conscious of him picking up on my anxieties and fears and them becoming fears of his. I’ve become incredibly self aware, and the last thing I ever want is for him to feel that he can’t walk into a room where he knows nobody, introduce himself and feel confident and comfortable. For him I want the opposite. I want him to always feel good enough. I want him to always feel that he’s worthy of being somewhere. And if I’m not demonstrating that behaviour as his mother, and I don’t think that of myself, then how is he ever supposed to understand that he shouldn’t feel the same? Having Joey is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Not just for the obvious reasons. But because every day he’s making me question myself. He’s made me so much more self aware than I’ve ever been. He’s made me want to be a better person, and because of that, I’m pushing myself to step out of my comfort zone. I’m pushing myself to do the work to become comfortable with who I am, and to live my life authentically and honestly, without worrying about what other people think. Has having children changed you in ways you didn’t expect? 🤍 . . #parenting #gentleparenting #responsiveparenting #attachmentparenting #newmother #firstyearofmotherhood #honestmotherhood #candidmotherhood