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Jamie Otis Hehner
@jamienotis

834,693 followers

I used to pray (and pray and pray!!) for this family I have now.🙏🏼 I'm feeling so thankful & blessed🥹 But I gotta be honest, I prayed for a marriage where I'd always have butterflies & it'd be deeply romantic & we'd each always give 50/50—our marriage is none of the above.🙃 What I've learned after marrying a stranger and making it work for nearly a decade is that whimsical romantic love doesn't last long. *And that's ok!* Love isn't black and white. And marriage is rarely 50/50.💯 If I thought our marriage was "bad" or "broken" when the butterflies left or the deep romance ended, I'd never have gotten to our first baby or our second...and I would have missed out on the chance to fall in love with the same amazing man over and over again.💜 Some days I love harder than Doug, but lately most days he loves harder than me.❤️ And when I don't feel it in my bones he makes the kiddos pile on me & give me kisses to make sure I know how loved I am.🥹 I've realized when the fire in our relationship fizzles out, we both need to focus on gratitude & being thankful for alllll the small things again! It's easy to see & be thankful for the things your partner does for you when it's new, but after months/years it becomes expected & you lose that gratitude.🙃 Never let your gratitude for your partner & what he/she does for you fade. The moment you do, your love will fade too.😬 If you're struggling in your relationship, just know that those butterflies don't stay forever. That's normal. Deep romance is hard to sustain-esp after babies.💯 and if you feel like you give more than 50/50 ... you probably do!🫣 We all give a little more than a partner from time to time. That doesn't mean your partner is a doozy and you gotta go find new.😅 Bc even with someone new you'll eventually (at some point) give more w them too.🤪 Thats just life. The goal is to find someone who will also be there for YOU when you can't give more than 50 or 40 or even 30%. If your person will stay by your side, give more than they receive and love you just the same when you can't give more than the minimum, THAT'S a great relationship.👏🥰 @doughehner, thanks for being my person.❤️ #ilysm