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Leah Deason
@becauseofozzie

41,401 followers

Kids are headed back to school and taking those adorable first day of school pics, but not me. Instead I washed a basket of clothes that Ozzie wore the last few weeks of his life. I folded them and packed up 1212 days of memories and dreams and placed them into an empty cardboard box. This time of year is extremely hard. It always has been, and I doubt the sting will ever go away. Ozzie never got the chance to go to school to meet his teacher, make new friends or learn on his own. He spent every single day at home or in the hospital with me. I tried to provide him the absolute best I could, but that will never replace the experience of going to school. The first day pictures, arts and crafts to hang on the refrigerator, enjoying time with classmates and exploring new things. It’s one of the many dreams neither one of us will ever get to fulfill. I try not to let it bother me, but knowing that so many special experiences were ripped away from me when he died makes it really hard. So many of my hopes and dreams died with Ozzie, and now it’s up to me to carry on for him and show him the world. Ozzie taught me the true meaning of strength and courage and most importantly, how to live with an eternal mindset. Those are lessons I doubt I would’ve learned and cherished had it not been for him. Life doesn’t stop when your child dies. His heart stopped beating, but his soul and presence are everywhere. Now it’s my turn to pick up those broken pieces and make the most of whatever time I have left. People say the childhood days are long and hard, but I’d give anything to be that exhausted mama in the car line waiting to pick up Ozzie after school. Cherish these moments friends and realize how truly blessed you are to have them despite how weary you might be. #childloss #childlossawareness #childlosssupport #grief #griefsupport #bereavedmother #backtoschool #healingjourney